Saturday, July 30, 2011

Goodbyes stink!

This past week, my eyes have looked like crimson almonds,red and puffy as they have wept me through 4 goodbyes.
Of all the mortal experiences, goodbyes are my least favorite. What is it about this experience that turns our soul inside out and leaves us with a hollow void, why is that? Why do we feel that wrenching deep down? why can't we just say: " K, love ya, see ya, bye" and be done with it?
But no, our hearts go into melt down, our eyes well up in tears, our voices crack and words can't seem to vocalize our anguish.

Tender thoughts of compassion, at the time, seem like a band-aid on a broken leg...we are in the middle of suffering!
Who voted to put this stinking venture on our life's agenda? I say we take it off and not have to let go of loved ones, keep them close and treasure them with every breath we have.
But, pause I must, as I remember now, that I was one who voted for this experience.

I voted to know what it felt like to sky dive off into the blue abyss of sorrow, hike the mountains of Joy, float in a river of tears and be sky rocketed into clear skies of light... My "travel agent" scheduled it all in ....and now, here I am in the middle of this journey with hands on my face thinking, "oy! what did I get myself into?"
Life. I got myself into life, all of it. Highs, lows ,dark , light.....

....as I think now of these these loved ones, I am hearing in the back of my mind and Beatles tune...
"You say Good bye and I say Hello..."
I am looking forward to the reuniting "Hello , Hello!...no more goodbyes, cuz we'll say Hello"